Still Standing

Alright all. Thought I would let you know what’s going on in my world nowadays, seen as though it’s been a little while since I’ve done a ‘this is my life’ post. My world is – I am rather surprised but relieved to say – a better place this weekend. I’m on talking terms with my ex, and some important things have been clarified, which means that my head is no longer rammed with as many devastating thoughts.

My eating is, more or less, back to normal, (thought my stomach is upset more times than not) and I’m not looking as boney as I was when I was in Stockholm a few weeks back. I’ve been ensuring that I treat myself regularly, not only because days are still difficult, but every little bit counts when you’re trying to gain back lost weight. One of my favourite treats recently has been pistachio halva.

IMG_1091My concentration has also returned, so I’m re-reading one of the books that changed my life – Wild by Jay Griffiths.

dI’ve also been keeping up with my fashion blogging, and documenting my daily outfits. Some people might wonder what the point of these Outfit Of The Day things is. Well, the most important thing that you should know is that I do it for me. I’ve always been passionate about fashion and always made an effort to establish my own, unique style. But my ensembles during my teenage years and the first half of my twenties very rarely saw a camera, so the only memories I have are the ones still hanging on in my brain. I guess that I’m making up for lost time, and taking advantage of the fact that I can now properly document my style transitions.

Another thing you should know is that when I’ve gone through severe depressive episodes, I’ve often stayed in the same clothes for days, while beautiful garments hung, cold and stiff in my wardrobe. When you’re depressed, looking nice is not a priority.

Having an Outfit Of The Day is something I can always look forward to, something I can plan the night before. Over these past few weeks, my OOTD has been one of the few things that has helped me to haul myself upright. Wearing something special on a daily basis makes me feel more at ease about leaving the house and most definitely improves my self-esteem. The outfit your looking at today is one of my new favourites. The dress was brought on one of my thrifting adventures and cost a wonderful £1.

IMG_2007IMG_1837I’m still taking things slowly and living hour by hour. It’s not good for me to think too far ahead right now, and it’s also important that I avoid hanging onto the bad shit from the past. There’s still a lot that needs re-arranging in the maelstrom that is my life, but one tiny step at a time will get me to where I need to be.

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